Potty Accidents – Your Attitude is Everything
Before you get ready to pull your hair out, just know it is perfectly normal that your child has one – or even several – potty accidents every day in the beginning. In fact, I have read a statistic that kids who have potty trained for six months still have on average one accident a week. See, you are in good company!
We will cover some handy advice how to handle potty accidents in a different post. Today, I want to help you reframe the situation to help you see accidents in a different light, because as your attitude about it changes, your life will get so much easier, and your child will sense this – really!
Do you remember when your precious little one first learned how to walk? He walked a step, or two, or even three – and then he fell. He got back up, walked a little, and fell. He wobbled, probably had the “Frankenstein gait” for a while, fell, got back up…you get the picture. Now, how often did you yell at your child, or even got angry or impatient, when he fell down while he learned how to walk? I bet the answer is “never”.
Learning how to use the potty is exactly the same thing, except it usually takes longer and is more difficult. So look at it this way: your child used the potty – woohoo – that’s just like taking a few steps. Then she had an accident – that’s just like when she fell down. Back up, and let’s do it again. See, it is so similar to when she learned how to walk.
Three accidents, but then pee-pee in the potty. Celebrate the successes! Share into the excitement! It is just like for everything else in life: what you focus on, expands. If you focus on “yet another accident”, you’ll get frustrated and impatient, and your child will only get negative vibes from you – and trust me, that’s not going to make potty training any easier.
But if you focus on the successes, there will be more of them. And your child will be excited to celebrate as long as you are. Every time he goes into the potty – in fact every time he merely sits on it, is a reason for celebration. Celebrate! Praise him. Tell him he did a great job and that you are proud of him, even if it is just for trying.
When he does have an accident, don’t make a big deal out of it. Simply say, “oops, you pee-pee’d into your pants. Let’s just take them off, put on some dry underwear, and then you can try again next time.”
Of course there may be situations when your child is really resistant, could care less about having wet underwear, wants to hear nothing about changing into dry clothes…I know, we have been there, too. And that’s a topic for a different post. But today I really, really want you to understand that an accident means nothing else but “oops, she fell down”, and then she will try again.
Remind yourself of this analogy when your precious child has a potty accident, and you will instantaneously be more loving and patient. Every day we have the opportunity to show our children that we love them unconditionally. Prove it to them, and prove it to yourself. You can do this!
With much appreciation for your journey and commitment,
Marion Solis
